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the not so regretable makeout story

i was 18 when i moved into a house with 2 of my guy friends. we used to have these huge ass parties and it was awesome... well one night i decided to party at a friends house and drank 2 shots of absinthe along with many many shots of some butterscotch shit that i wasnt too sure about, i think i was to the point of talking about life and religion and hippie-ness with my "new best friend", who i just met. i was too drunk to drive obviously, and i called my roomie, chris, and his girlfriend to come and get me. on the way home i decided it would be a wonderful idea to tackle our other roomate,jt, when we got there. so i did. we wound up breaking almost everything in the house falling all over the place making out. i think i hit my head at least 12 times on the wall and the doorknob. but the good news is, we've been together ever since that night and we're now engaged with a baby girl.

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Can I get a Big Mac

One of my favorite drunk stories was the time we got to so hammered we went to Jack-in-the-Box and ordered Big Macs and Chicken nuggets. We got into this huge argument with the person taking our order, we thought she was purposely messing with us by saying they didn't sell those items there. We were yelling at her to quit screwing around and complete our order

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Drunk as a skunk

Ok.. this is seriously embarassing but oh so funny...
There was this Halloween party out on a reserve... and I went with some friends to check it out... we got there around 7 or 8, and we brought along about 5 24's and a few bottles. Our booze didnt even compare to what was already there... There was a wall stacked full of 24s and whatever and a table full of every kind of fuken bottle there ever was.. lol. So we were just introducing ourselves to everyone and enjoying ourselves... drinking ,drinking,dancing, drinking and more drinking....
Anyways, I must have enjoyed myself too much because the next thing i knew I woke up the next day on the front lawn wearing a towel around my shoulders as a damn cape.. I didnt remember a damn thing. But people said I was running around the damn yard all wasted yelling "theres coyotes chasin me" with the towel around my neck haaa yah thats my "superhero story" as a certain friend of mine calls it.. LOL.
Yah Tronn buddy laugh ur ass off.

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My Story

I dont know if this is my "best" drinking story, but its certainly crazy. Mind you this is after sharing half a bottle of rum, and a bottle of vodka with just one other person. So it starts out with me wandering around the back yard, apparently looking for something I lost and being very upset about it...somehow I end up under the back porch, and then I fell and start rolling around in the dirt. After doing this, I crawled out towards the steps and started screaming about how the world was spinning and ripping grass out of the ground. Finally I was coaxed to come sit up on the porch steps, and at that point I demanded a glass of water. My nice friend brings it to me, and I go to drink it and just dump it over my head and demand more...they say it happened three times before they stopped bringing me the water. I guess I wasnt able to be convinced to come in for about an hour or two. Once inside, I grabbed a bag of shreaded cheese out of the fridge, put some on bread and ate it then stumbled up to bed(why I would choose to eat that, I have no idea). I layed in bed for probably less than five minutes, leaned over my bed and puked all over the floor. Then rolled back over and went to sleep.
Definitely a night I regret for acting like such a fool...but its pretty funny thinking back on it now.

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My Drinking Story

Me and my friend were in the Air Force and getting drunk every night (we were intel, don't you feel safe). We got back to base one night and I decided to sit down on the sidewalk outside CQ (night guard) station. I layed back and after a while realized that I couldn't sit up. So I pulled out my phone and called CQ on the official business line (I was maybe 5 feet from their door). I said "This is Airman _____, I was wondering if you could send someone out here to give me a hand standing up." The guy they sent was a dick, he walked me all the way to my room cuz he thought I was drunk.

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